1 2 Excite Bike 49,600*
1 1 Free Space (FFR Edit) 91,450*
1 1 Power 94,550*
1 4 Norfolk Gals 159,650*
1 3 Pita 164,300*
1 2 Love You Anymore 186,000*
1 1 Trip to the Moon (Club Remix) 221,650*
1 2 Halcyon 232,500*
1 4 Mocha Ocean 246,450*
1 2 Dance 2 This 249,550*
1 2 Seattle's Finest (Parental Advisory) 261,950*
1 1 SuperMario 8bit Eighties Remix 269,700*
1 4 Sonic 1 Final Zone 275,900*
1 2 This Beat is For Tha Streets! 280,550*
1 2 For Who I Am 285,200*
1 2 Computer Dreams 288,300*
1 3 Moonlight Sonata 310,000*
1 2 London Bridges 356,500*
1 3 Stay With Me FFR V1 382,850*
1 2 Activity Unbroken 385,950*
1 3 Soul Shift (ffr edit) 390,600*
1 4 Stormy 404,550*
1 2 Freak Out 441,750*
1 3 The Color of Battle 454,150*
1 3 SkellyBones 463,450*
1 2 Falling Into You 466,550*
1 4 Mega Man 2 - Dr. Wily Theme #1 478,950*
1 4 Dr Wily Theme V2 482,050*
1 3 Spontaneous Hydroxide 492,900*
1 3 Come With Me 497,550*
1 3 Bomb the Base 505,300*
1 2 Driveway [Light] 514,600*
1 4 The Ushering In Of The Magical Era 516,150*
1 2 Red Dress [Light] 530,100*
1 4 Tom Savini vs Greg Nicotero [Heavy] 562,650*
1 5 Secret Zombie Room 568,850*
1 4 Amity 570,400*
1 4 Snowflakes 606,050*
1 5 Distorted Reality (cut) 621,550*
1 3 Switchback [Light] 632,400*
1 4 Unhearted 702,150*
1 3 RainDrops 720,750*
1 4 Riddle Me A Rat's Nest 773,450*
1 4 Snake Devil [Heavy] 795,150*

T’was the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Except the psycho bitch on the couch

I looked pleadingly to my girl
Her face fury red
While visions of me and the double mint twins
Danced in her head

With bile in my throat
And no help in sight
I put on a smile
And my sphincter got tight

This is Rudolph I thought
And turned to argue my case
But I must’ve had a “what’s your problem bitch” look
‘Cause she punched me in the face

I picked up her $300 pradas
The left and right shoe
And out into the street,
Both shoes I then threw

Out the front door she went in hot pursuit
Yeah this girl would chase a designer label
Like a fat guy
After a velour jogging suit

In fear for my life
I locked up the place
Turned my attention to Rudolph
And wish I had mace

When all of a sudden
There arose such clatter
I sprang from the couch
To see what was the matter

I grabbed the cord
Pulled open the blinds
There was Noelle
Quite out of her mind

My heart stopped
Frozen with fear
While she beat on the glass door with a vodka bottle
Filled just ‘bout to here

I knew the window couldn’t much take it
And she was screaming
“Unlock it you bastard
Or I swear I’ll break it”

I couldn’t let her do that
It was a rented place
So I opened the door
And she punched me in the face

So summoning my manhood
From bottom to top
I screamed like a little girl
“I’m calling the cops”

I’d just finished dialing
And she was standing right there
Wearing pearls and those pradas
But otherwise bare

She spoke not a word
But went straight to her work
Reeling me in with that
You’re my-big-daddy-smirk

And I heard her exclaim
As she turned out the lights
You know this is your fault,
I love you too much to fight.